Fundraising Kick-off!

(This is reposted from the official fundraising blog, Get Kyle Back on His Feet!)

I'm totally new to this so bear with me.

I'm one of those statistics you hear about on the news made real.  I had health insurance just last year and I will have health insurance again in September but as of now I am uninsured.  Lo and behold, I get a debilitating injury on the one gap year that I am uninsured.


What Did You Do?  

Completely Ruptured Achilles Tendon (Right).

Long story short – plyometrics; specifically, from doing high-rep box jumps while participating in WOD 12.3 of the CrossFit Games Open Qualifiers (2012).

Now just mentioning those 2 syllables either brings confusion or causes an inadvertent gut reaction to defend the exercise regimen.  I completely understand both sides since I've been doing it for around 3-4 months (known about it for 6 months or more) but still remember the days when I was skeptical of exercise/training as a competitive sport.

I'm not here to criticize or defend the protocol.  I just want to want to be back on my two feet again!

4 Days After Acute Injury

The Issue:

It's been nearly 3 weeks since my acute injury and I haven't taken care of it yet.  Why?  I was told initially that it was a sprain.  After seeing an orthopedic surgeon 2 days ago and describing classic textbook symptoms of feeling a sharp pain in the back of my heel/calf during the injury and then having a positive test for the Thompson test, the doc said—without a doubt and without an MRI—that it is indeed a completely ruptured achilles tendon that requires immediate surgery.

So I don't have time to apply for Indigent Health Services at Collin County Health Dept. (though I'm still going to give it a shot on Monday), which takes a minimum of 2 weeks.  I don't know if I would qualify for that in any case as there are many, who are probably much worse off than me waiting in line.


Why Do You Deserve My Hard-Earned Money?!

I'm only 26 and I can't foresee a life ahead of me without sport or intense activity.  Try and think back to a time you've been down and out and wanted some support.  If I don't get the surgery, I'm told a re-rupture of the achilles is a constant and apparent threat.

I believe Karma is real.  What comes around goes around.
When I'm a head honcho, calling the shots I won't forget ya, brotha/sista!


The Breakdown (Give me the Dadgum Numbers!  How Do I Know You Won't Pocket This Yourself?!):

The surgeon is taking a measly $667.60. The anesthesiologist is pocketing approximately $300. The lion's share of the total amount comes down to the hospital fees (originally $9300 with a 30% discount) $6,550. So around $7,500 total. I will know an exact amount on Monday when the receptionist tells me the anesthesiologist fees.

On the off chance that this fundraising event is wildly successful and it went over the cost of the surgery, then I will gladly pay each of you back in CASH, in person! I will even upload a photo of the surgery receipt on this website when it's all said and done. I'm all for transparency and frankness.

The orthopedic surgeon will be John T. Wey, M.D. from L & W Orthopaedic Associates and he had a fellowship trained in foot and ankle surgery, which is why I would like to have the surgery done at this place (Methodist Richardson Medical Center).

I have yet to schedule the surgery as my father would like me to explore more affordable options but I would like to get this done hopefully as soon as next week.  I will post an update with more details as I get them.


Why Don't You Get Help From Official Charities or Companies?  I'm Poor, Yo!

I've tried.  I reached out to some Catholic Charities and are waiting for their response.  I think a measly achilles tendon surgery isn't even a blip on their radar. They want the sad childhood leukemia child with the shiny, bald head.  All I can do is hobble around and look pathetic (or in my book, totally badass pimp limp).  No one would even bat an eye.

Oh yeah and a good friend of mine told me it would be great if I could get CrossFit HQ to match the amount that is raised from this fundraising effort, especially since there have been a large number of injuries related to Open WODs both last year and this year involving high-rep box jumps and I believe I could raise awareness in the risks of these injuries. (If you are interested in this, you can read a (controversial) article by Beast Modal Domains here.  I won't delve into that here.  Beware, it's a hilarious article but it's got some language.)

I would hope that CrossFit HQ would want to make a strong effort to show they want to prevent future injuries in the sport and to shed the negative media attention surrounding the controversy over its safety.

I am planning on writing a letter seeking assistance from HQ but if anyone has any connections with HQ that would be of great help.


OK STFU Already!  How Can I Help?!

See that "DONATE" button at the top right?  0_0  ---------------------->

*Click* on that and you can donate any amount you want to a PayPal account.  No one will know how much you donated, so don't be shy.  No one will judge.  Any amount is a worthy contribution.  St. Peter at the pearly gates will cross out that little menial sin you committed last week for your generosity.

(FYI:  PayPal deducts $0.30 + 2.8% for every transaction that is made for their service.)


Go To Hell!  Everyone Needs "Assistance" in This Economy!  Where's My Charity?

If you don't want to help and think I'm an ingrate, that's fine.  Just know that angels will cry and doves will fall from the sky in mourning.

J/k.  Jesus and I still love you. =)


Was There Something I Didn't Address?  Have More Questions?

Shoot them in the comments below or send an e-mail.

A New Year, A New Me in the New World...with A New Blog

The only constant in life is change.

Since the chapter of my life in Taiwan has already come to a close (for nearly 2 weeks now). I have started a new blog to follow my new interests now that I'm back in the United States. If you wish to follow my new path in the New World then read my new blog: An Aspiring Yogi in the West.

Keep your Olympics Beijing, Taipei has the Deaflympics!

Taipei is hosting the 2009 Deaflympics!

Beijing spent millions and had Zhang Yimou direct the Olympics opening ceremony to much fanfare, but not to be outdone by its sole adversary - Taiwan went all out this year.

Even commissioning aboriginal Taiwanese singer, A-mei (the same singer that was once banned from singing in China) to sing the DEAFlympics theme song, "Dreams You Can Hear." (Cruel irony or spiteful Taiwanese humour?)



Suck on that, commie bitches!


While the oppressive neighbor to the north gathers the world's premier athletes from around the globe, the mini-island below does one even better! Taiwan has gotten the world's deaf athletes to gather in the polluted Taiwanese capital to compete in athletic events ranging from cycling to swimming.

"To qualify for the games, athletes must have a hearing loss of at least 55 db in their "better ear". Hearing aids, cochlear implants and the like are not allowed to be used in competition, to place all athletes on the same level." (Source: Wikipedia)



P.S.: If you think I typed any of this with a straight face you're a damn idiot and don't deserve to be reading this blog entry. The fact that I even include this note at the end shows how much faith I place in the mental acuity and reading comprehension of my astute readers. Cheers.

Suffering from a Palestinian perspective

"'I know that suffering is the truth,' Khaled said quietly His teeth were clenched. 'I know that suffering is the sharp end of the whip, and not suffering is the blunt end - the end that the master holds in his hands.'

'If you'd been born and raised in Palestine, you'd know that some people are born to suffer. And it never stops, for them. Not for a second. You'd know where real suffering comes from. It's the same place where love and freedom and pride are born. And it's the same place where those feelings and ideals die. That suffering never stops. We only pretend it does. We only tell ourselves it does, to make the kids stop whimpering in their sleep.'"

Note: This is copyrighted material that belongs to the author of Shantaram, Gregory David Roberts. I transcribe these passages on to my blog out of sheer admiration for his writing. I found the passages on suffering to be especially moving and powerful. I may include other quotes in due time but I may not since there are just too many gems in this fantastic novel.


The context:

"'I was in love with a Jewish girl once, you know?' Khaled asked. 'She was...she was a beautiful girl, and smart, and maybe, I don't know, maybe the nicest human being I'm ever gonna meet. that was in New York. We were students together. Her parents, they were reform Jews - they supported Israel, but they were against the occupation of the territories. I was with that girl, making love to her, on the night my father died in an Israeli prison.'

[...]

'Anyway, I went back home, and I was just in time for the October War - the one the Israelis call the Yom Kippur War. We got smashed. I made it to Tunis, and got some training. I started fighting , and I kept on fighting, all the way to Beirut. When the Israelis invaded, we made stand at Shatila. My whole family was there, and a lot of my neighbours from the old days. All of them, all of us, we were all refugees, with nowhere else to go.'

'Were you evacuated, with the other fighters?'

'Yeah. They couldn't beat us, so they worked out a truce. We left the camps - with our weapons, you know, to show that we weren't defeated. We marched, like soldiers, and there was a lot of firing in the air. Some people got killed just watching us. I twas weird, like a parade or some kind of bizarre celebration, you know? And then, when we were gone, they broke all their promises, and they sent the Phalange into the camps, and they killed all the old men, and the women, and the children. And they all died. All my family. All the ones I left behind. I don't even know where their bodies are. They hid them, because they knew it was a war crime. And you think...you think I should let it go, Lin?'"

The Warmth

I could write reams about all the things that have been coursing through my mind or about all the issues I've been struggling with. Instead, I'll just quote a few lyrics from Incubus, which succinctly and effectively lays out what I keep trying to remind myself:

So don't let the world bring you down.
Not everyone here is that fucked up and cold.
Remember why you came and while you're alive
experience the warmth before you grow old.

"Eating sushi has become the new Russian roulette."

*

So recently I got wind of the illness that Jeremy Piven, the actor who plays Ari Gold in Entourage, acquired. He got mercury poisoning from eating sushi twice a day for two years. He had six times the allowable amount of mercury as advised by the FDA!

Now I had known about the carcinogens and pollutants that accumulated in the flesh and fat of deep-sea fish and bottom-feeders for many years, but I had pushed it to the back of my mind for the sake of my palate and out of negligence. However, the news of one of my favorite characters on one of my favorite television shows being stricken by such an unusual and serious injury abruptly pushed that knowledge back to the fore.

I just did a quick Google search and numerous studies and articles highlight the dangers of eating seafood nowadays, particularly sushi/sashimi.

While I don't plan on giving up on eating sushi or all seafood, it does make me much more wary. For instance instead of getting that tuna sub for lunch, I'll probably get a smoked chicken or beef instead. It's just a crying shame that seafood is so damn tasty!

(Does eating raw seafood as opposed to cooked seafood somehow make mercury, PCBs, etc. more toxic? Can someone post an answer to this because I don't see how cooking it would get rid of the mercury, PCBs, or other toxic chemicals present, but most articles only point out the dangers of eating raw seafood.)

Here's a handy, compact list for the cautious eaters out there.

I had been eating red snapper, farmed U.S. salmon, and orange roughy for years! Who would have known?

It's official. Man-made pollution is encroaching on my state of well-being and happiness!

*(Photo belongs to 'joonelovesfood.blogspot')

Empire's Greatest Movies of All Time

Empire Magazine compiled a list of 500 of the greatest movies of all time. Now I usually abhor these types of lists by authoritative organizations/magazines/whatnot because they usually comprise of black and white movies by Bergman, Frtiz Lang, Godard, etc. For instance, AMC's list placed "Citizen Kane" as the most important movie ever made. While we were all forced to watch CK in high school and I found it to be decent, in no way would I place it in the top ten list of my favorite movies. The problem I have with lists that put movies like "Casablanca," "The Third Man," "Maltese Falcon," and "Chinatown" at the top of their list is that they are extremely pretentious and completely disregard crowd-pleasing favorites that are masterpieces in their own right. I'm referring to films like "Aliens," "Indiana Jones," "Dog Day Afternoon," "The Godfather," and "Scarface." Beloved classics for the masses but too 'mainstream' for the critics.

What I like about Empire's 500 list is that it combines art-house, foreign flicks with blockbuster, nostalgic favorites. It also does a good job of incorporating great films from abroad into the list as well like "Cache," "Old Boy," "Layer Cake," and "Yojimbo." Instead of the traditional Godard, Truffant, etc. they also include well-known directors of my generation like Martin Scorsese, James Cameron, Ridley Scott, Ang Lee, David Lynch, Steven Spielberg, Tim Burton, Sidney Lumet, etc. This list even has populist favorites like "The Goonies," "Lord of the Rings," "The Matrix," "Donnie Darko," "Network," "Kill Bill," "Transformers," 300," "Lost in Translation," "Fight Club," "Dazed and Confused," "28 Days Later," "Batman Returns," and "The Breakfast Club."


While, a lot of my favorite movies are in the 300-500 range, I'm just glad they even made it on the list. One of these days I will have to compile my own list, which I think will be more representative of our generation. For starters, I was pleased with the plethora of Kurosawa films sprinkled throughout the list but I would definitely include more of Alfonso Cuaron's, Park Chan Wook's, Danny Boyle's, Zhang Yimou's, Luc Besson's, and Federico Fellini's works.

Whole grains are bad for your health?

So I watched the documentary, "Food Matters," yesterday. It largely advocated a raw food diet. The documentary made a lot of sense and had the current head of the Gershon Foundation speaking in the film as well. Dr. Max Gershon also figures largely in the film, "The Beautiful Truth" (2008), which I plan on watching soon.

Anyway, I did some online research out of curiosity and the caveman or paleolithic diet actually conflicts with the raw food diet even though they both seem to agree on a lot of points like how humans evolved over millions of years not eating whole grains and raw vegetables, which contain toxins and 'anti-nutrients' prior to cooking or fermentation. The problem with cooking is that it denatures the vitamins, minerals, and enzymes present in the raw vegetable or grain.

Also, I was surprised to learn that soy in its natural state is highly toxic and needs to be fermented to render the toxins inactive (i.e., traditional soy sauce, miso, tempeh, 'stinky tofu'), and that regular unfermented tofu, edamame, modern soy sauce, soy milk may pose adverse health effects since they aren't fermented.


Oh and back to the point, I read a really interesting article asserting that the hunter-gatherer diet is what the human body is most suited for. The author argues that a vegetarian diet is unnatural and leads to a host of health problems, since vitamin B-12 is mostly present in meat for instance.

I just found it really interesting and surprising that the popular raw foods diet and the paleolithic diet both espouse that whole grains are bad for your health when so much of mainstream media is telling everyone to buy whole wheat bread, whole wheat pasta, whole wheat whatever, brown rice, etc.


So red meat may be more healthful than whole wheat bread? Some food for thought.

Aaron McGruder is a genius at satire

The Boondocks Season II was straight up brilliant.

It had been awhile since I'd watched any episode and season 2 just reminded me why I love the Boondocks so much.

This is one of my favorite seasons (example of "a nigga moment"):

Uncle Ruckus always makes me laugh:

It's shows like this that restore my dwindling faith in TV.

"Clazziquai Project" is a gem amidst the K-Pop refuse

I know this band has been around for quite awhile and that they're popularity has waxed and waned with the concurrent popularity of the K-drama, My Name is Kim Sam Soon aka My Lovely Sam Soon, but I've recently rediscovered them (as I was negligent and forgot to transfer my CP collection from my old Dell to my new Macbook).

Anyways, I normally don't like the assembly line J-Pop wannabe style characteristic of K-Pop, but I really dig the acid jazz music from Clazziquai.



While I like the original the most, it's also nice to understand the lyrics (English version of Dance):


A fan made MV of Be My Love and She Is, with scenes from My Name Is Kim Sam Soon:

"Zodiac" had an amazing soundtrack

The opening to "Zodiac" was absolutely brilliant.
The audience sees the evening views of San Francisco set to Three Dog Night's "Easy to be Hard":



Donovan's haunting voice in "Hurdy Gurdy Man" and the psychedelic melody really complemented the chilling scene and uncertainty in the "Zodiac.


If after hearing this song, you were as curious about the meaning as I was then check out this website.

Pay special attention to 'jonchapple' and 'flipFLOPpitaj's comments (Obviously, I didn't know how to correctly punctuate the user names, indicating proper nouns and possessive qualities...correct me in a comment if you know the correct punctuation).

「天將降大任於斯人

必先若其心志，勞其筋骨，

餓其體膚，空乏，其身，

所以動心忍性，

以增益其所不能。」

「醜陋的中國人」

今天我們最後一堂課時，一位波蘭的學生提出一個奇怪的現象。她說別的民族會害外地來的人民，但中國人或台灣人反而最愛害自己人。然兒舉了例子，她說她的朋友具有台灣人的臉，但在美國出生的。那位女生去面談時被拒絕，因她看起來向台灣人。那家補習班反而請了一位不會說英文的歐洲人當因問老師。

這個變態的形態怎麼回事呢？

我最近讀了柏先楊的演講在美國愛荷華大學叫「醜陋的中國人」：

「有許多朋友同我所：如果頂頭上司是中國人時，你可要特別注意，特別小心，他不但不會提升你，裁員時還會先開除你，因為他要表示他大公無私，所以我們怎麼能跟猶太人比？」

華人最可能互相被判，最大的敵人也就是別的華人。
為何華人之間有那麼多仇恨？

那華人能依靠誰呢？不能依靠以養民族的民眾，也不能依靠外地來值得人民。那只能依賴自己了。

Amerika

So after a year or so of hearing from various sources about America's lack of healthcare, religious fundamentalism, rampant racism, poor educational system, hypocritical Neo-cons in positions of power (e.g., Larry Craig scandal), authorized torture in Abu Ghraib and Guantanamo, Patriot Act, illegal NSA wire-tapping, racial profiling, pork-barreling, Sarah Palin, "Dubya," declining economic superiority, etc. my N. Irish friend, Conor S., naturally asked the question: "Why would anyone want to live in America?"

At the time we were discussing America's lack of universal healthcare, so I just answered that there are other things in life that matter besides healthcare . . . but I was swimming earlier and so I had some time to think about it.


1. The Lotto Theory

I liken it to why so many people buy lottery tickets day after day, even after a lifetime of not winning. Even though statistically it is more likely for them to be struck by lightning, they still continue to spend their money on a dream that doesn't come to fruition because of that minuscule chance that they may strike it rich. I think people abroad buy into this American dream. They think that they have the best opportunity to become a wealthy baron in the US of A. These people might not even be that naive and know how corrupt the system is--that odds are stacked against them since the rich, white Republicans are in a tight-knit, incestual circle and without the networking relationships, despite your talents and skills, you'd be hard-pressed to rise above the middle-class threshold. Still, blind hope drives them.

American society has long been famous for its social mobility. Unlike India, there is no caste-based society and its not your background or race that counts but your bank account figure-in other words, money talks. Well, that's what they say anyways. I like how the indie movie, "Igby Goes Down," addresses this in a humorous way. By painting Upper East Side folk as soulless and bankrupt of human emotion.

2. Hollywood/Media

American TV and movies are what kids around the world grow up on. Hollywood really sells America. Just take a look at movies like "Die Hard 4.0" or "Rambo." The tough American hero saves the day by killing the enemies and bringing American-style democracy to the world. I don't even think it's really a conscious decision. It's only natural that American Hollywood execs and the like would want to paint their homeland in an idyllic manner. After all they do live in the US, so they also want to buy into the notion that America is one-of-a-kind, special, and better than any other place in the world.

Just take a look at Fox News. Despite widespread allegations of inaccuracy and bias, it is still the most watched news station in the nation. Precisely because it ignores its own tag-line of being "Fair and Balanced," instead they give the people what they want. People don't want the truth, they want to be deluded and told that they are living in the no. 1 country in the world and that the only problems affecting America are coming from outside the country. Fox News viewers like to live in a simplistic black-and-white world, where there is an easy to identify enemy, Muslims. And the neocons even explain away critics by painting liberals as treasonous, "anti-American" traitors that may or may not be sympathetic to terrorists.



Of course there are other factors that may contribute to people seeking American residence. For instance, a cleaner environment . . . that is unless you live near a pig farm: Rolling Stone article.

People also look to America as a paragon for civil liberties . . . that is unless you care about the environment, animal rights, or in general social activism: NY Times article.



Author's note: Don't get me wrong. America has its faults but all countries do. I write this mostly because I fear America is sliding into another McCarthy era. Nazism started in Germany when the economy was in shambles and a charismatic leader appealed to the mob, namely people's base emotions (i.e., fear and hatred of minorities). Fascism doesn't develop overnight; an entire nation must be lulled into accepting these policies and essentially demand for them to be implemented.

The Role Race Plays in US Politics

Taipei Times Editorial

"Race is a crucial factor in the US presidential race
By Sin-ming Shaw

Monday, Oct 20, 2008, Page 9

Three-quarters of Americans now disapprove of US President George W. Bush’s performance. Given this, and the fact that the policies and values of Senator John McCain and his vice presidential nominee, Alaska Governor Sarah Palin, are almost identical to those of Bush, you would expect Senator Barack Obama to be leading in the polls by a wider margin than he is.

The reason that he is not, I suspect, is racism. When polled, most older white voters overwhelming reject Obama, even if many of them are unhappy with Bush. Indeed, one-third of Democrats have at various times told pollsters that they will not vote for a black candidate. And a recent Associated Press/Yahoo News poll suggested that his race is costing Obama 6 percentage points in the polls.

Most of the time, this racism is covert, only hinted at through code words. The media, particularly the increasingly popular conservative media and talk radio, are particularly important here.

Obama is consistently criticized for his “otherness” and his “arrogance,” terms that call to mind the label of the “uppity nigger” from the days of segregation, which are actually not so far in the US’ past.

FOX CONDESCENSION

In a recent interview, Bill O’Reilly, the most popular TV talk show host at Fox News, the US’s most watched news station, talked down to Obama in so condescending a manner that some viewers were reminded of the image of a slave owner in an old Hollywood movie putting a young black upstart in his place.

Sean Hannity, another star host at the Rupert Murdoch-owned Fox News, demanded repeatedly on air from one interviewee, Fareed Zakaria, a well-known columnist at Newsweek with a CNN talk show of his own, to know whether he thought the US to be the greatest nation on earth.

The dark-skinned Zakaria, a naturalized American from India with a doctorate from Harvard University, felt compelled to affirm his loyalty for the US twice. It is hard to imagine Hannity demanding such a public affirmation of loyalty from anyone with white skin.

THE ‘BRADLEY’ EFFECT

So how much is race costing Obama? The problem is that pollsters cannot effectively measure the problem. They call it the “Bradley effect,” first noted during the 1982 governor’s race in California, when Tom Bradley, the then African-American mayor of Los Angeles, lost the race to his white opponent despite leading in pre-election polls throughout the campaign.

The idea behind the “Bradley effect” is that white voters won’t reveal their prejudices to pollsters. Instead, they lie and say that they will vote for the black candidate when, in fact, they have no intention of doing so.

Of course, many people now say that Obama has proven that the “Bradley effect” is a thing of the past. But his continuing difficulties with white working-class voters, who in the primaries went with Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton, suggest that, perhaps, the “Bradley effect” is still alive and well.

Younger Americans accept inter-racial relationships as part of the normal social and sexual landscape. Yet, the very speed with which American society has progressed has threatened half of the country, older and mostly white, unable and unwilling to live in the present.

The moderate Republican Party of former US president Dwight Eisenhower and the Rockefellers has been taken over by a radical crowd, with even Eisenhower’s granddaughter now openly backing Obama. So it boggles many non-Americans’ minds that so many in that great nation still do not wake up to the reality that four more years of Republican rule will further degrade and bankrupt the country.

In any civilized society, ignorance is not illegal and being moralistic is anybody’s inherent privilege. But what is alarming is how private religious beliefs and morals have increasingly shaped the secular agenda of the US, whose Founding Fathers had specifically designed the Constitution to separate state and church.

RADICAL REPUBLICANS?

Today’s radical Republican Party represents a large segment of the population that believes that abortions and same-sex marriage are immoral, that God sent the US to Iraq, and that bailing out Wall Street is “socialism.”

At the Republican Convention in August, the ear-splitting chants of “USA! USA!” and “Drill, baby, drill” sounded like cries of desperation, as well as of defiance against an enemy who threatens American’s divine right to remain supreme. Palin has since identified the enemy, proclaiming of Obama: “This is not a man who sees America like you and I see America.”

Whether or not her judgment carries a racist undertone, as many observers believe, the polls indicate that many Americans agree.



Sin-ming Shaw is a former visiting fellow in History at Oxford and Princeton universities."

___________________________________________________________________________

I don't normally copy and paste entire articles but I thought he made pretty good points, especially on 'the Bradley effect.'


Speaking of articles...they wrote my name wrong in the MTC Quarterly so I have been downgraded from a triumphant black stallion with a white mane to a lowly camel-long story-I might clarify in a later post.


I like this song by 四分衛:
(I saw them live in concert at Spring Scream and their other songs were good too. This one is sort of 'emo.')

"It's been said since time begun, youth is wasted on the young"

The grass is always greener, eh?
Before I got this job I thought I was wasting my life and was desperate to start making money and start getting real work experience...and now that I'm in that position I want nothing more than to have my freedom and idle time back.

Everyday is the same now. I rush off in a daze to my hour-long commute to work. Waiting for the subway, waiting for the bus, always waiting for something...Then I get to work and wait for the workday to end so I can go home and eat something.

The world's on fire
and my heart keeps on telling me that these are early days
Philosophy don't worry me
I've changed my mind so many times so many ways
and acting like the only one of thinking about what I have done I've found
experience is cursed
It's been said since time begun, youth is wasted on the young

-Driftland, "Youth is Wasted on the Young"

The End of the World As We Know It?

"Some of us—especially those under 60—have always wondered what it would be like to live through the kind of epochal event one reads about in books. Well, this is it. We're now living history, suffering one of the greatest financial panics of all time. It compares with the big ones—1907, 1929—and we cannot yet know its full consequences for the financial system, the economy or society as a whole."

http://www.newsweek.com/id/163449

That said...I certainly don't feel it on the other side of the Pacific in Taipei, Taiwan where 'recession' or 'economic downturn' (經濟不景氣）hangs on everyone's lips but the fact remains that restaurants and department stores remain packed and busy and people are still going about life as usual. So here in the East, I just don't feel the panic.

Seeing the news from America is like watching a car crash from afar, worrying about those affected but bewildered at what to do or how to empathize.


On a related note, I skimmed part of "Network" after watching a provocative, controversial 'documentary' called "Zeitgeist" on Google Video, which played several dramatic clips from "Network (1976)":
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-594683847743189197
(it got an 8.8 rating on IMDB)


From IMDB, Memorable Quotes from "Network":

Howard Beale: I don't have to tell you things are bad. Everybody knows things are bad. It's a depression. Everybody's out of work or scared of losing their job. The dollar buys a nickel's work, banks are going bust, shopkeepers keep a gun under the counter. Punks are running wild in the street and there's nobody anywhere who seems to know what to do, and there's no end to it. We know the air is unfit to breathe and our food is unfit to eat, and we sit watching our TV's while some local newscaster tells us that today we had fifteen homicides and sixty-three violent crimes, as if that's the way it's supposed to be. We know things are bad - worse than bad. They're crazy. It's like everything everywhere is going crazy, so we don't go out anymore. We sit in the house, and slowly the world we are living in is getting smaller, and all we say is, 'Please, at least leave us alone in our living rooms. Let me have my toaster and my TV and my steel-belted radials and I won't say anything. Just leave us alone.' Well, I'm not gonna leave you alone. I want you to get mad! I don't want you to protest. I don't want you to riot - I don't want you to write to your congressman because I wouldn't know what to tell you to write. I don't know what to do about the depression and the inflation and the Russians and the crime in the street. All I know is that first you've got to get mad.

Howard Beale: [shouting] You've got to say, 'I'm a HUMAN BEING, Goddamnit! My life has VALUE!' So I want you to get up now. I want all of you to get up out of your chairs. I want you to get up right now and go to the window. Open it, and stick your head out, and yell,

[shouting]
Howard Beale: 'I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE!' I want you to get up right now, sit up, go to your windows, open them and stick your head out and yell - 'I'm as mad as hell and I'm not going to take this anymore!' Things have got to change. But first, you've gotta get mad!... You've got to say, 'I'm as mad as hell, and I'm not going to take this anymore!' Then we'll figure out what to do about the depression and the inflation and the oil crisis. But first get up out of your chairs, open the window, stick your head out, and yell, and say it:
Howard Beale: [screaming at the top of his lungs] "I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE!"



I'm not alone cause the TV's on yeah.
I'm not crazy cause I take the right pills everyday.
And rest, clean your conscious, clear your thoughts with speyside with your grain.
Clean your conscious, clear your thoughts with speyside.
Salt, sweat, sugar on the asphalt.
Our hearts littering the topsoil.
Tune in and we can get the last call.
Our lives, our coal.
Salt, sweat, sugar on the asphalt.
Our hearts littering the topsoil.
Sign up it's the picket line or the parade.

-Jimmy Eats World, "Bleed American"

呆若木雞

Maybe its the warmer climate
Maybe I'm a smarter primate
Maybe its the beer I'm drinking
Maybe I've stopped over thinking

[...]

But the universe is just an empty space
And all the stars can disappear without a trace
I'm so glad that this has taken me so long
Cos it's the journey that made me so strong

-Snow Patrol, "Warmer Climate"




Recently, I keep listening to certain tracks on the "Eyes Open" album.
I don't consider myself 'EMO' but I guess I've been in that mood as of late.

(I think "Open Up Your Eyes" is a little overplayed but I like the music video).


I want something
That's purer than the water
Like we were

It's not there now
Ineloquence and anger
Are all we have

[...]

We need to feel breathless with love
And not collapse under its weight
I'm gasping for the air to fill
My lungs with everything I've lost

-SP, "Beginning To Get To Me"


I read this poem/short story (?) by Zhuangzi （莊子）called "Fighting Cock" (「鬥雞」) and no it's not supposed to be funny, despite the name translated in English...

Anyways, I sort of feel like that cock in the story. He had so much passion and fire (鬥志高昂 in the beginning but after all the training, he just becomes a wooden cock ( 呆若木雞).

(And if anyone knows the story they are probably thinking: you dumbass! you misinterpreted the entire morale of the story! Well I know that in this story, 木雞 is actually used in a positive manner in that he had reached such an elevated state that the other cocks did not even dare get close to him...but anyways when applying that state to me I'm using it in a negative way).

Before the intense training and reformation, the impulsive （根本沉不住氣) cock also felt he was superior to the riff raff around him: 他老是自命不凡地對周遭怒目相向。I've found that since I've come to Taiwan I've been feeling more 自命不凡 than before. Is that necessarily bad? It is according to Chinese culture and yet all the luminaries of Chinese have regarded themselves as so.


So I don't think I'm making any coherent sense anymore...and I feel like a dick by making obscure references to an old Taoist philosopher, whose poems or short stories are written in 文言文. Plus, I need to get back to work bc the format problem (Microsoft Word-> Open Office -> Windows -> Mac OS X as well as font issues, etc) has been resolved and so I need to get crackin' at it.

〈頭髮的風波〉深邃的一段

「中國人的反抗，何嘗因為亡國，只是因為拖辮子。頑民殺盡了，遺老都壽終了，辮子早留定了，洪樣又鬧起來了。全留著頭髮的被官兵殺，還是辮子的便被長毛殺！有多少中國人只因為這不痛不癢的頭髮而吃了苦，受難，滅亡。」

－魯迅

一九二零年十月

Human Frailty/ 人類的脆弱

So today the teacher said something that stuck with me. We were reading the preface to Lu Xun's collection of short stories, which is titled 啊Q正傳. And the author said that the characters in Lu Xun's stories all have a defeatist attitude, resign themselves to fate, oppress the good and timid but fear the wicked, are hypocritical, and are cynical. The Chinese is much more eloquent than my slipshod English paraphrase at 2:30 AM, so I'll provide the quote here: 「道盡了世間眾生的真是面貌－宿命意識，失敗主義，欺善怕惡，假仁假義，犬儒性格。。。等。」

Anyways, so then she went off on a tangent somewhat and talked about the phenomenon of buffets cropping up around Taipei. She said that the 吃到飽現象 started around the late '90s and reflected this need by humans to stuff themselves with food in order to fill a void. They need to fill their stomachs up in order to feel a sense of contentment, of fullness（ 滿足口福）。She spoke of this as human frailty. That we as human beings constantly chase after this ephemeral feeling of contentment, which can come from as simple and base a source as eating till one bursts. 人類很脆弱，必須己撐著滿滿地才能滿足。

I apologize for my English readers for all the Chinese in this entry (I doubt I have any regular readers anyways), but I think I'm going to start moving in that direction as I have been in Taiwan for a year and I feel I've only recently started to take my studies seriously. I think it's reality setting in that I'm going to leave this fantasy isle in a few short months and I don't have much time left to study. The prospect of being another cog in the machine is not exactly motivational, so I'm trying to savor what little time I have left.

Well, this is day X of my insomnia month(s) and I find it's when I write the most-whether that be on Facebook walls, messages, MSN, or e-mails. I want to stop but like I said I have insomnia...well it's not even really insomnia because I eventually fall asleep just not at the time I want to as I have class in the morning.

無論如何，我都是最想睡時就往往失敗。我發現半夜是我最常反省的時光，也是我最犬儒性格和失敗主義的時段。白天心靈裡埋下去的思想與感情都冒出來了，顯然是胡思亂想。好了，我得避免上網沈溺自己的廢話了。晚安。